From the Beginning!

Following the way I feel mesmorizes me

into darkness, deepness, thoughtlessness.

I sometimes wonder if anyone can really

hear my head humming.

Burned out, flipped out, cried out, tapped out.

I know there is someone out there worse.

It's the only thing that makes me feel better.

It's the only thing that makes it okay.

If they can do it, then so can I.

We're getting close to the story, and where it all begins.

Soon I will shed for you a few more tears.

I will plunge back into time and recapture the moments

I fell to my knees.

I will tell you the tale of my deepest sorrow, my saddest sad,

and hopefully, by expelling all of the hate, the need,

the fear, I will regain a little more of myself.

And after I've done that, I'll do it all again.

And then after that, I'll do it again.

Don't get me wrong, reader...

there is love, and admiration, and sappy.

There is tenderness, and thoughtfullness, and caring.

There is the Good Side.

One can not exist without the other.

Life does not balance without the Ying and the Yang.

The Black and the White. The Beer and the Smoke. haha.

Anyway, I'm getting close to doing something I have

wanted to do for a very long time.

And that is to tell my tale from the very beginning.

I think it will help... I think it will help.

~ J.M. Jesseau

11/15/06

8:40PM